Ch. 20 Twinsanity

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING from the Loud House.
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With Lynn Jr. out of the way, Miranda noted that she had 3 girls left to talk with. This would only take two sessions as she was having the twins in the same room together. While it seemed that Lana and Lola were well aware of the family's predicament, they were still six years old. As such, Miranda felt that it would put them both at ease if they had each other in the same room. This would be especially helpful when it came time to discuss their feelings. From what she knew about them so far, the twins were the most likely of the Louds to engage in physical confrontation. Miranda wasn't too concerned about this though, as it was perfectly normal for siblings to fight, especially identical twins. Another obvious indicator was the fact both girls dressed differently, leading to the main reason of such clashes being due differed personalities.

As if to be proven correct, Miranda could hear a scuffle just outside the door.

"No, I'm going first!" One feminine voice yelled.

"No, I'm first!" A tomboyish voice yelled back.

"Beauty before age Lana! Plus, I'm a princess!"

"Well I'm the oldest of us both!"

Seconds later, Lana and Lola spilled through the door, pulling each other's hair and struggling to get the upper hand on one another. Miranda wasn't fazed by this in the slightest. In fact, she smiled. "Sibling rivalry at its finest. Almost reminds me of when I fought with my brother." She thought.

"Girls, girls. Calm down. I wanted to talk with BOTH of you." The psychologist stated.

Both twins looked at her before glancing at each other. Giving a sigh, they separated before sitting a few feet from each other on the lounging chair. Lola lied down while Lana lied on her back with her head hanging over the edge. She didn't seem to care too much about her hat falling off.

"So girls, how are you both feeling today?"

"Lethargic..." Lana spoke.

"Dreadful..." Lola quipped.

"...Ok then. Now, I'm sure you both know what we are here to discuss right?" Both six year olds nodded. "Ok, so what we will talk about can be strictly confidential, as in it will only be between us. I won't tell anyone, but you girls are free to talk about it with your family if you so wish. Sound good?"

Lana gave a hard glance at Lola. "...Why are you looking at me like that?" The princess asked in annoyance.

"Because you have a long history of being a motor mouth."

"I promised not to tell anyone about that stuff ok?! And you're the one to talk since you have mud breath!" Lola retorted.

"Glitter-face..."

"Potty mouth."

Lana sat up on her seat. "Stuck up princess."

"Gross eater!"

"Germaphobe!"

"Albutophobe!"

"Wait, what? I'm not Canadian!" Lana stated in confusion.

"It means, you're afraid of being clean you philistine!"

"That's funny since I've been forced to STAY CLEAN since we got punished! Just like you can't wear your stupid sparkly towels!"

"It's called a GOWN you idiot!"

Miranda would've cut in by now, but she felt it was better to let the girls get their anger out. Plus, she was actually learning more about the twins as they continued to argue back and forth. In fact, she was making notes about the two while they were stuck in their petty squabbling.

"At least I don't threaten to spill secrets like a creep!"

Lola felt appalled by that statement. "I DO NOT! Not all the time at least."

Lana gave a harsh glare. "So I suppose that whole 'turning us into your slaves' thing was supposed to mean nothing? And it's also funny that you called me a philistine since you always like to call Lincoln that!"

"At least he actually likes me more!" Lola said sharply. Lana couldn't help but laugh at that accusation. "What's so funny?!"

"I've been close to Linc ever since we were born! I never even had to get dirt on him just to ask him for help. Plus, I'm not a jerk like you, so if anything, he likes ME more!"

Completely fed up, Lola pounced on her twin, slamming her head into the soft seat with each word. "YOU. TAKE. THAT. BACK!" Instead, Lana just slapped at Lola's face.

Miranda cleared her throat, getting the children's attention. "Girls? Remember that we're here to talk, not fight. And to be honest, I would like to ask you both questions concerning your brother."
The twins glared at each other for a few seconds before finally separating. They sat even further away from each other now.

"Now Lana, why do you believe that Lincoln adores you more?"

"He doesn't-" Lola started.

"Lola, wait your turn. I'll ask you the same thing." The Hispanic woman said in a stern tone. Lola was about to form another retort, but knew that Miranda wasn't going to back down. So she just sat there, fuming as steam rose from the top of her head.

"I say that Lincoln likes me more because, I've spent a good amount of time with my brother as far as I can remember. He's always been there for me when I needed him, even when he doesn't want to be bothered. He's practically the best brother I could ask for. He helps me take care of my reptiles, doesn't mind getting dirty, and he doesn't mind my gross habits unlike SOME people."

Lana glared at Lola, who returned the gesture. "He's also the reason why I'm like myself today."

"Care to give more detail on that?" Miranda asked.

"When Lincoln was my age, he used to like playing in the mud a lot. I thought it looked pretty fun, so I joined in. It was the best thing, that's ever happened to me. And believe it or not, Lola actually liked to get dirty back then."

The younger twin's eyes widened. "What?! I did not!"

Lana nodded. "Yes you did. That was probably the only time we actually got along with each other without fighting. Well, before you started acting like a spoiled snob after getting into that pageant stuff."

Lola gave a huff. "Well, I clearly don't remember any of that stuff."

"Mom still has pictures of it. You just never checked."

"Well from what I remember, he wasn't the reason you started digging in the trash."

Lana shrugged. "True. One man's trash is another lady's treasure. But even so, I don't like peanut butter and sauerkraut sandwiches."

"And yet you'll eat moldy pudding..."

"Interesting..." Miranda thought. "It seems you and Lincoln have been close for a long time Lana. Now Lola, why do you think Lincoln likes you the most?"

"Because, he actually knows how to be prim and proper unlike SOME people." She glared at Lana. "He participates in my tea parties, helps me prepare for my many pageants since that time one was going to give the winner tickets to Dairy Land, he likes to keep me happy, and he'll always protect me no matter what!"

"He'll do that for any of us Lola..." Lana pointed out.

"Yeah, but what you don't remember was that Lincoln used to have a bit of an attitude when he was younger."

The look on Lana's face said it all. "Wait, so he used to act like you?"

"Well, Lincoln didn't participate in pageants or anything, besides that one time when he was trying to win an award. But when I was two, some big fat kid who was probably three or four stole my giant whirly pop. Since of course I was only a baby, the only thing I could do was cry. Lincoln was over there in a split second and made that boy pay dearly." Lola laughed. "Ah, good memories."

"...I don't think I was there when that happened."

"You weren't. It was at the park and you were back with dad at the house."

"I think it's quite interesting that you both have different memories of your brother." Miranda spoke.

"Yeah. I guess we do." Lana smiled.

"But I still can't believe I used to like being dirty." Lola grimaced.

"Hey it's not that bad."

"Says the girl who took my place in a PRIM AND PERFECT PAGEANT." Lola teased.

Lana blushed. "Hey! That was only for the Dairy Land tickets!...But I guess I did like it a little..."

"So I assume both of you are pretty close to your brother?" Miranda asked. Both twins nodded in response, which the doctor laughed. "I expected no less from a group of kids like you, but it seems to be that Lincoln isn't close to both of you."

"Huh?!" The girls asked in shock.

"Given what you both said, Lincoln doesn't seem like the type to pick favorites. He probably knows that if he did, it would cause you both to argue more. He's there for both of you because he loves you as an older brother and wants to be of help, even if it cuts into his own activities." The twins sat there in silence to process that piece of information. Internally, the doctor hated the fact she now had to address the main topic. "Now, this is hard for me to ask, but what do you both think about the whole incident concerning what's been happening lately?"

Deep frowns formed on the kids' faces seconds after that question was registered in their minds. They should've known such a question would arise, as the sisters that had went before them had been asked the same thing. But, they were so caught up reliving the good memories they had with their brother that it caught them off guard. The twins looked at each other in worry, unsure how to answer. The only thing that came to mind was that this whole situation was a nightmare no child should be exposed to. Lana was on the verge of crying as images of her brother's fearful expression flashed in her mind. With Lola, the guilt was slamming back into her like a run-away cruise ship crashing into port. Glancing at her hands, she could feel the slight cuts on them when her fists impacted her brother's mouth, ruining his smile.

"It's horrible Ms. Lopez...that's...that's all there is to it..." Lola finally spoke up. "...I used to enjoy making Lincoln squirm with the threat of making me mad...but now I wish I never got into pageantry in the first place..."

"But, Lola...that's your thing...I don't think you'd ever give that up..."

"But what you don't know is what it did to me..."

"What do you mean?" Miranda asked.

"...The world of pageantry is a very cruel...the main reason I got into it was because mom thought it was a good idea to enter me in when another lady who also had a girl in that same business thought I looked cute enough for it. At first, I didn't think nothing of it since I thought it was a fun idea. I managed to win enough times that I was able to participate in the Little Miss Prim and Proper Beauty Pageants. And on my first day there...that's when I learned that it wasn't as much of a field of daisies as I thought..."
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On a calm and warm evening, Lola was getting herself ready for her first Little Miss Prim and Proper Beauty Pageant. On the verge of being 5 years old, she was the youngest participant in tonight's festivities, and that made her nervous. She was aware that she'd be going up against girls who had probably been in the game for a few years. Lola herself only started just after she turned 4. The little girl was dressed up in a small pink gown with glitter draped on it for a sparkly effect. Peaking through the curtain, she could see the that the crowd was larger than in most pageants she'd been in.

"Mommy, I-I don't know about this...there's a lot of people out there." Lola stammered.

"Oh sweetie, I know your nervous. But don't worry, we'll be sitting in the front row to support you." Rita spoke in a soft voice. "Plus, I thought you got used to being in front of a lot of people."

Lola's past stage fright actually helped boost her cuteness factor, as most found it adorable when a child gets nervous in front of a large audience. "I-I have, but it's just that there's SO many out there than before. And all of these girls look older than I do...I just don't know if I can do it..."

Rita knelt in front of her daughter. "Lola, the important thing to remember is that you just need to focus on being you. You don't have to be like any of these other girls. As long as you be true to yourself, you can do anything. Also, you look so cuuute!" The mother playfully pinched Lola's cheek, earning a blush from the child.

Lola couldn't help but smile. "Thanks mom." She stood on her toes and hugged her.

"Knock 'em dead sweetheart." Rita hugged her back. With the pageant about to start, Rita left to go take her seat next to her husband. Lola looked down at the tiara she was given to wear with the gown before setting it on her head.

The show began with little delay, each child doing their best to impress both the judges and audience. When it came time for Lola to perform, it was clear that her nervousness was returning, but then remembered her mother's encouragement. After the introductions and opening performances, she managed to win over both parties. Her competitors were both impressed and envious. It had been awhile that they actually had someone who looked like it could give them serious competition, especially for a newcomer. However, one participant in particular was giving a hard glare at Lola as she continued to wave at the audience.

A 5 year old redhead wearing a frilly pink dress with a matching tiara to match was gazing a hole in the back of Lola's head. She had worked on her pageant fame for the last year and was on her way to being the next big Little Miss Prim and Proper. The girl could even blow away the competition since the other girls didn't look as cute as she did. She didn't think much about Lola when she first showed up. But when it became clear that not only was Lola as cute as a kitten, but she also knew how to win over the judges, it became clear that she was a threat that needed to be eliminated. Since Lola was still new, the redhead didn't know much about her besides the fact she had made a name for herself in the pageant business. However, it was also clear Lola was still nervous about being in a big time competition. After realizing this, the 5 year old figured she could play to her insecurities.

Lola came back behind stage after she was given a generous applause. Giving a sigh of relief, "I can't believe I nailed that. Maybe I am ready for this kind of thing."

"You may be right. You sure know how to win people's hearts that's for sure." A childish voice spoke to her right.

Looking over, Lola saw the redhead that had went out before her. "Oh, hi um...Lindsey was it?"

"Yep. The one and only. Nice job out there by the way."

"Thanks." Lola smiled. "So, how long have you been doing this?"

"Since I was 4. I'm 5 now, so that makes a year."

"Really? I'm almost 5!" The blonde said happily.

"Cool. So, you ready for the next phase?" Lindsey asked.

"You mean the talent phase? I got a pretty cool staff routine cooked up."

Lindsey gave a smug grin. "A staff routine? You're gonna have to come up with something better than that."

Lola grew confused. "What do you mean?"

"The judges won't be impressed by a little staff routine. That's for babies. You gotta up your game. Otherwise, you aren't gonna last long in the big leagues."

Lola scratched the back of her head. "But...that staff routine is all I know..."

"Welp, it was nice knowing you Lola." Lindsey patted her on the back before walking away. "Real winners know when to adapt. But, I guess you'll be stuck as a loser."

Lola watched the girl walk off. She knows that Rita told her to just be herself, but she just got advice from someone whose been doing this stuff longer than her. She felt conflicted. Should she try something different, or stay true to herself? She watched the other girls' routines as she had time before she had to do hers. The blonde was impressed by their singing, dancing, musical numbers, and even one girl did a mime act. Looking at her staff, Lola felt what she had was insignificant. Even if she wanted to try something else, it was way to late to change course, especially since she was about to go next.

When her name was called, the Louds cheered for her as she about to do her ever famous staff twirls. However, the parents immediately noticed that something was wrong. Their daughter didn't look like she had confidence in herself to put her heart into it. Unlike previous times, her technique was a bit sloppy and poorly timed. To wrap it up, she accidentally hit herself in the mouth with the thickest part of the stick. Holding her mouth in pain, she gazed at everyone's reactions. It was mostly silent, with a few crickets chirping as if they were laughing at her. Before the judges could even score her, she ran behind the curtain with tears in her eyes. The other girls felt bad for her, but Lindsey quietly held a confident grin as she watched her handy work run to the girl's restroom.

In spite of the abysmal performance of her routine, Lola still won 4th place. Not a bad feat out of 10 other contestants. Lindsey Sweetwater won first place during that pageant. However, Lola felt she didn't have anymore confidence to continue on and was thinking about giving up her pageant career. To make matters worse, when she hit herself in the mouth, it knocked both of her baby incisors loose. She wouldn't come out of the twin's room for a couple days after the pageant despite everyone's attempts to cheer her up. What did get her out of her slump, was the recommendation letter for her to participate in the next pageant. Even then, Lola still lacked confident in herself.

On one sunny Wednesday, her mother took her to the park in an effort to get her daughter to smile again. Instead, Lola continued to mope as she walked around the playground. As she was sulking to herself, she spotted a familiar redhead a short distance away with a few other girls she didn't know. Seeing Lindsay Sweetwater, Lola grimaced and turned away from the jungle gym, wanting to get as far from her as possible. However, she stopped when she heard her name mentioned.

"So you think Lola will shape up to win the next one?"

The redhead scoffed. "That blonde? Please. After the last pageant, she won't stand a chance. After all, only thing I had to do was get her nervous enough to slip up, and if she starts getting confident again, well I'll just give her a grim reminder of what she really is. Besides, it's not like she had any real talent." Lindsey said in a mocking tone, making the other girls laugh.

"Yeah. That staff routine was just traagiiiiic~!" Another girl sang out.

What they didn't know, was that Lola heard every word from her post behind one of the metal supports. The little girl was shocked and horrified by this revelation. She thought Lindsey was a sweet and kind girl who gave her some friendly advice. Seems that she was only looking out for herself. Lola's right eye twitched as she felt overcome by a new emotion that felt so foreign to her. She had experienced irritation before, but this wasn't that. It was pure anger. She wanted to march right over to Lindsey and rip the red hair right off her skull. She wanted to punch her so hard that her face would be permanently disfigured. Lola wanted to do everything under the sun that would result in physical injury to that girl. However, this would only resort in short time pain. Lola smirked as a new thought came to her, one that would make sure that Lindsey knew she crossed the wrong person.
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"Wow...so that's why you hate her." Lana spoke.

"She deliberately tripped me up, and I wanted to make her pay so bad...but I realized if I attacked her physically, it wouldn't get to her the way I wanted it to. So I decided to get to her where it REALLY hurts: her pride. During the next pageant I approached her in mock nervousness, letting her think she had an easy win. But then I told her that I knew about her plan, and threatened to not only tell the judges about it, but also the other competitors too. The look on her face said it all, and she knew that she lost her edge. Not only that, I came in first place."

"And then you kept winning more and more pageants?" Lana asked.

"Exactly."

"Was it easy to maintain a winning streak?" The doctor asked.

"To be honest, no. Some girls would try to blackmail me, or in other cases attempt to bully me physically. But, given how much I fight with my sister, I could handle them. As for the blackmailing, well...let's just say I had to find some dirt to have leverage..." Lola gave a stern frown. "I didn't like the last part though, cause there are some things that are better left unsaid...and as a whole, the blackmailing tactic got very...intoxicating to use..."

Miranda noted this down. "Please explain..."

"...Lana was right when I said I used my siblings as my personal slaves...they were holding a Secret Siblings Club, but wouldn't let me in because I wasn't trustworthy enough...so I...I had put a microphone on my tiara and learned all of their secrets and threatened to tell our parents about the things they were hiding from them...all I wanted to do was fit in, and I went about it the wrong way..."

"But in the end, you gained our trust by taking the blame yourself." Lana smiled. "Though I'll be fair with you sis, you have ego problems..."

"I'm well aware of that..."

The psychologist tilted her glasses. "Ego problems?"

"...I...I have a bad habit of blaming others for stuff even when I'm also at fault...the more I kept winning, the more I became spoiled...I won a decent amount of cash from my pageant wins, as well my princess go-kart, my swim gown, and even some of the cosmetic stuff I have...I knew I had it all, and it's pretty obvious it went to my head...a lot..."

"Wait, I thought mom and dad bought all of that stuff for you." Lana quipped.

"Please Lana. Our parents don't have that kind of budget."

"True."

"Anyway...a lot of times I end up blaming others when I'm also at fault...I try to act innocent as if I did nothing wrong, but I ended up acting like I'm the center of the universe...I blamed Lincoln for a lot of things because he was probably the easiest to blame and I knew he'd just take it...I...I even tried to put blame on him for w-what happened last S-Sunday before Lana s-snapped me out of it." Lola wiped her eyes as her voice was breaking up. "...I used to take pride in seeing myself as a princess, to be able to get what I want without much trouble, acting like I'm rich or something...I-I even used to like getting Lincoln to agree to doing what I want whether he wanted to or I had to strong-arm him...b-but if there's one thing I want now more than ever...I want my brother to be normal again...I'm p-probably the worst sister on the face of the earth..."

The girly twin started to cry. It was one thing to see herself as a monster, but it's hits harder when your sibling sees you as the same thing and wants nothing to do with you. Lola hoped that Lincoln would be willing to forgive her, but given how he'll go into a panic whenever she or her other 8 sisters are around, Lisa would calculate this chance at probably .008%. She tended to use her siblings for a lot of things, though Lincoln seemed to draw her ire more than the other siblings. Maybe it was because he was weak-willed or some other thing she didn't know. But Lola was regretting the times she had been mean to him, especially the time where she organized a prank just because he wanted some peace and quiet. Sure, she could've just told Lincoln it's rude to ignore his sisters, but she felt a prank would be best to teach him a lesson. However, such an elaborate plan backfired all because she left Lisa out of the equation. If anyone were to label herself and Lana as who was good who was bad, Lola assumed people would automatically label her as the bad twin. It wasn't even a guess why Lincoln would probably like Lana more than herself, despite Miranda's own input.

With the tomboyish twin, she watched her sister continue to cry to herself. This whole session enlightened her to the fact she now knew more about her twin that she ever would've thought. She knew that Lola became a brat due to winning so many times, but she hadn't realized it was more or less due to a forced habit she picked up. What she didn't know, was that girls could be that cruel, but then again, that's what happens when a little girl gets spoiled with attention and riches. The tomboy was glad her pageant thing was only a one time deal. Last thing the family needed was two Lolas. Lana also made a mental note to pelt Lindsey Sweetwater with as much mud as possible if she ever saw her again.

Lana crawled over to Lola and embraced her. "Lola, you aren't the worst sister ever...yeah, you may be the brattiest, but not the worst...we all still have good moments, remember?"

"...L-Like what?..."

"Remember the time we covered for Lincoln when he came home after curfew? Or the time we all stopped fighting and did our chores when we thought Lily went missing? Or the time you got Lincoln his victory undies even though he lost?..."

"...I guess t-that's true..."

"And what about the time we got Lisa to enjoy a snow day for once? Or last Christmas when you wanted to make up for every bad thing you did? Would you have done any of them if you didn't really care about us?"

"...No...I guess not..." Lola replied, her tears beginning to cease.

"I know we both fight almost all the time, and while it's usually Linc who steps in to stop us, we eventually learn to call a quits to it. You may make me mad from time to time, but I would never stop loving you...to me, you're the best sister in the world, and nothing is gonna change that."

Lola gave a small smile, hugging her twin. "T-Thanks..."

Miranda gave a small chuckle. "You both are quite literally the textbook definition of sibling relationships. No matter how many times you both get into arguments or physical confrontation, you'll still find a way to love each other. Not only that, it seems you both learned a thing or two from each other, which has brought you closer. Normally, this only occurs between older children and teens, but you girls are definitely smarter than most other children. I noted that Lana said your brother is usually the one who breaks up your disputes, but it seems you two are well on the path to settling matters without needing to resort to blows. Of course, it won't always happen, but it may occur a bit less. However, there is one other question I need to ask you Lola...do you have trouble fitting in at times?"

Lola shifted nervously. "...Sometimes I guess...I'm pretty fearful on the pageant circuit, and some of the girls I compete against go to the same school I do...word travels fast and hardly anyone interacts with me much...even when I try to start a casual conversation they just scream and run..."

"I see...well, in this case, the best thing I would recommend is taking small steps to change your image. Making a new friend can be difficult at times, but nothing breaks the ice better than trying to find a common ground. You can start at school or possibly at another of your pageants."

"...That makes sense I guess. Though it's definitely going to have to be at school because I'm forbidden from doing anything pageant related for a while..."

The doctor gave a shrug. "Anywhere is a start."

"Do...do you think Lincoln will love us again?" Lola asked.

"Anything is possible Lola. Not all fears last forever, but they tend to be difficult to overcome. When I last spoke with him, I sent a small message that would hopefully get him to think things over. Fears tend to make people think irrationally, and as such, they will make decisions based on instinct and not from thinking things through."

"So, I guess that means there's a chance he might return to normal?" Lana asked.

Miranda nodded. "Now, is there anything else you girls wish to discuss?"

The twins shook their heads. "Thanks Ms. Lopez." They ran up and hugged her legs.

"Oh, and just a note for you since I know the last one is Lucy, she can be a real bummer at times because she's always depressed." Lola stated as both twins walked to the door. Lola noticed Lana's hat wasn't on her head and spotted it by the chair. She grabbed it and dusted it off before returning it to her sister.

"Hmm...wonder what brought that on..." Miranda noted in her head. She's spoken with depressed people before, and it usually revolves around said clients not finding any purpose in life. Usually these people tend to be teenagers or adults, but an 8 year old emo? That's almost unheard of...